Posts Tagged ‘kate moss’

Is This Tit Worry Time For Naked Kate?

June 6, 2008

Artist\'s impression of what Kate Moss\'s right tit probably looks like

‘Close friends’ of bone-thin stupidoid Kate Moss suggest the retarded former jizzmop of spangle-eyed fuckwit Pete Doherty is suffering from Michter’s Mammary Droop-Milk Syndrome. Kate (80) was spotted wandering around in London’s fashionable Left End, when she was spotted by, and fakely worried about by, eagle-eyed papacrappsies. They noticed the waif-like nitwit’s right tit dangling beneath her belt line, with all milk dripping off it.

“Michter’s Mammary Droop-Milk Syndrome is an illness common to celebrities,” Gabriel O’Dangtananagarivo, BC&B’s resident celebrity doctor told our reporters. “It commonly manifests in a drooping right knocker, with all milk coming out of the end. If left untreated it can lead to a complete rectal prolapse, severe anal bleeding, and colour blindness. I suggest Miss Moss goes somewhere for treatment … and fast!

Kate is said to be considering her future in light of her new breast condition.

“She’s wondering whether to get it professionally seen to,” a close friend of the idiot model told us, “or if it’s alright just to have at it with a Stanley knife and a bottle of meths.”